Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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