you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
