So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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