I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
