I think i peed on brittanys purse
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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