K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize