just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Life is so much better after having sex.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
