i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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