I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
