i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Drake has all the answers
Randomize
