Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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