Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize