I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
