For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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