anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize