My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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