margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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