Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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