You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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