More tranny stories later!
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
