Buhtt sex?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
