You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
