i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
