Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I need a burrito and a hug.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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