just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
