dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS