Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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