was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
