yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
