When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
