i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
