We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize