He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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