I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
