tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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