one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
