His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize