so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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