how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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