she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
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