Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize