ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
