Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize
