...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize