I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I'm always down for nudity.
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