nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
