I puked a lego.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
