Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize