I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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