Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize