Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
